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Garen Marie's avatar

Okay, I'm into it. The dialogue is nice. Has a good flow and feels real. I already get a sense of the characters from it. I'm most intrigued by the title. That's a wtf for sure. My only complaint is that it's so short, but I get that this is only the beginning. Always love a mystery.

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Keith Long's avatar

Well at least someone likes it hah Yeah each scene is fairly short, so I just posted it along the split. The name should work nicely for the story, assuming I finish it and take it where I originally planned

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Garen Marie's avatar

Maybe it's just me, but I find Fridays to be a pretty slow reading day in general on the ol' Stack. But just so you know, you must finish this miniseries now as I must get the title payoff at the end. 😉

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Keith Long's avatar

Yeah it definitely seems to be lol

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Parker McCoy's avatar

I'll tell ya what's going to give you mouth cancer, kissing Barnaby's ass. LOL. Great line. I like the little twist at the end. Why was he shot in the forearm, too? Very great start, Keith. I'm looking forward to more.

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