28 Comments
User's avatar
Emily S Hurricane's avatar

My god this is masterful. Difficult to read emotionally but beautifully written. 💗

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thank you for the kind words🙏 It is definitely heavy in content

Expand full comment
Nick Winney's avatar

for some reason i knew there was a subtext or code in this because the prose was just the wrong side of poetic to be just poetic... but I didnt spot it. i was looking at the first word of sentences or lines, every other word or third word...somehow patting myself slightly on the back for the spidey sense that there was a hidden layer...but huge round of applause for you Keith 😎🫡..

have you created a new thing here... it's challenging to do I'm sure!

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thanks Nick — yeah there were definite times where I just couldn’t quite square the flow with the letters I was using. I wrote the two simultaneously, so sometimes I would backtrack the one to change the other lol it is definitely a challenge

Expand full comment
Nick Winney's avatar

i was wandering how you did it… chicken n egg!

skillful piece! nice to experiment!

Expand full comment
Simpulacra's avatar

That’s pretty damn cool man

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thanks much - it was an interesting challenge

Expand full comment
Laura's avatar

This is seriously an impressive idea wtf I like this a lot. So well done.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thank you, thank you!

Expand full comment
Scoot's avatar

this is horrifying yet intensely clever. The format emphasizes the story--sometimes it's hard to see what's hiding in plain sight. But then you hit us over the head with the 'punchline' if you'll forgive the phrase.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thank you! I’m glad it came across that way, because I wanted to do this idea but I wanted there to be a reason for doing it — so I’m glad it compliments the story

Expand full comment
Garen Marie's avatar

Well done! I especially like the way you describe his acrostic as controlling her story.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thanks Garen! It was a fun exercise, I love acrostics and the idea of hidden messages lol

Expand full comment
Nick Buchheit's avatar

Love the artwork and the prose. It was a poetic read and no idea you were hiding another within it.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thank you kindly, and thank you for commenting/reading 🙏

Expand full comment
Tom Schecter's avatar

Damn dude. Everything you're throwing at the wall is sticking right now. Massive hat tip.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thank ya brother — means a lot to hear

Expand full comment
Tom Schecter's avatar

You’re fucking killing it! Keep it going.

Expand full comment
Lyndsey Resnick's avatar

Brilliant, Keith. The construction works just as you wanted.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thanks very very much🙏

Expand full comment
Saint-Lazare's avatar

Clever and subtle way to show the complexity of toxic relationships.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thank you🙏

Expand full comment
Will Mason's avatar

Dark and powerful study. Those final three words are so haunting - I think because they appear to be the hardest for survivors to do sometimes. Really thought-provoking piece.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thank you so much. I wanted to have her get out of the situation and I wanted that to be what broke the acrostic - so I'm glad it had impact

Expand full comment
Liz Zimmers's avatar

Brilliant! It’s a perfect nesting doll of a story!

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thanks Liz!I

Expand full comment
Jennifer James's avatar

This is amazing. What a balancing act! Both stories are poetic, truthful, and painful. Please feel free to do more experiments.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

Thanks so much! I do enjoy a good experiment!

Expand full comment